My watch stopped this morning. I was slightly annoyed because my entire life revolves around time. Time to sleep, time to get up, time to get the kids ready for school or pick them up, time to prepare my homeschool lessons for my little guy, and time to teach him, time to make meals, do chores, run errands, race the kids off to one thing or another, time to volunteer, time to spend with friends and family, time to spend with my husband, time to spend alone with God…and now, time to write.
I hurried to my jewelry box where I had a couple extra watches, and immediately replaced my stopped watch with a working one. The problem is, I just… replaced it. Without skipping a beat, I put the chain back on, got back into my hamster wheel and started to run again, full speed, full strength, keeping up my pace to the beat of the ticks on this, my next cheap metallic watch.
The Lord had put it on my heart in the wee morning hours to write today about love, so I rushed off to write, arrogantly determined I would summarize love in a short blog- length article, all within the time constraints I had set for myself. The only problem was, nothing was going right, and time was being demanded of me in other areas. My mind stuttered, my points fractured, and I landed in a frustrated heap on the floor before the Lord.
As it turns out, what God was doing with me, was inviting me on a journey to discover love, but I was so busy trying to control my time, that I almost missed the invitation entirely. The watch battery had died just as He had determined it, to show me that like any of man’s other idols, I was still bowing down to it with gusto. Flesh cannot write about love, control cannot explore it, and the ticking of a watch most certainly cannot paint it with any colour other than grey. Writing about love is a journey itself, one I cannot stuff into any man-made calendar slot to later tick off as complete. Like the Spirit itself, love comes only from the Father, and its description must flow from His Spirit through a fully surrendered heart, in His time, not my own.
So I am taking off my watch, not for everything, or my kids will be stranded at the bus stop. By God’s grace I want to look at time as it should be, a measuring tool, and no more than that. This is my new time, time to sit quietly and avail my entire self to what He is about to teach me. My prayer is that as He does, He will use my keyboard to share it with you. So I invite you to come along with me, over the next weeks, or months, or years – in His timing – as I, in the Spirit through His Word, discover what Love is…